to be alive*

 now that i know enchanted is about him, ive rekindled my fascination with adam's tweets. and he just keeps getting better. in other news of the day: ive been listening to old playlists. aand cleaning the kitchen [whuuuut. yeah i speak truth.]

[glee + teenvogue = like heaven]

ive eaten too much chocolate cupcake batter. mmm so delicious, but all i want is water for the rest of the day. for now, im gonna keep watching my favourite part of camprock over and over. "been feeling lost, can't find the words to say.."

so inlove with her dress.

wishing: i could play guitar.

contemplating: how much things can change in a week.

aaand my new life goal: working for unicef.

{live like there's no tomorrow by selenagomez}

happy wednesday everyone xoxo

the last enemy that shall be destroyed is death*

If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals. -Sirius Black

[two sleeps]

xoxo

she's a good girl..*

many things i missed this morning: summers away at the beach with you. perfect birthdays. best friends who can eat as much cake as i can. not having to explain myself, bc you can see it before i even breathe your name. you being here with me.

 

but as the day progressed, so my world improved.

dinner plans with my inspiration. a completely quotable movie. squishy candy. a beautiful day of sunshine. application forms. bonding with my brother. roads lined with greengreen trees. new glee episodes. catchy lovesongs. rubyred nailpolish. driving through the city at night. today was filled with life's little joys*

my heart is smiling, as i drink my delicious hot rooibos tea and tell you i want you to bake me a cake. bc nothing makes me happy like watching the sun sparkle on the sea* that, and having the most incredible friends in the world :)

songs of the night: every song i have by matthewmole. (go.download.them.)

enchantedhappy xoxo

and i will make you sound like..*

"well, now i don't have a chance with any of the girls in this room.."

oh, my boy..

if only you knew

if only you tried

if only she had told me

that you looked at me like that

my restless heart would

stop for a second

and then beat for you always.

if only her first reaction was different

if only she didn't catch your eye

youd see through her laugh, her dance

and hate me for not showing you

the truth before it broke you

if only i could be

embracing fall with missadachi

with the boy who chose his girlfriend over our friendship

rushing with jessicasmith

exploring restaurants in town

listening to this wonderful cd

-without wanting to share it all with you

if only you saw the way your eyes shine

the way your heart glows

and my world reflects it all back to you

"pick me

choose me

love me"

for now i will attempt to sleep

and not dream of ending friendships. again.

tomorrow is one of lastminutes. birthdays. and a night with sarahjane <3

enchantedhappy xoxo

stop procrastinating, finish your posters. GO*

gosh, how great are zebras? VERY. You know what else is cute..? *you guessed it* SQUIRRELS. please please please, charles. pleeeaaaassse.

today i learnt: never to buy benben a large smoothie. ever again. ever. that people steam cakes. -with irons (ahem ahem zoe). that andrew winter did not infact buy his license, and is a wonderfully capable driver. and a very efficient fudge-stealer. tonight we had birthday dinner and pinkchampagne. and many many photographs (which youre also not going to see..)

things im dying to tell you but probably never will: youre going to be an amazing husband. and a wonderful father. but really. sitting: under my camprock blanket. watching seasonfour. waiting: for you to finally realise. and tell me what to do. wishing: that even for a moment, things could be simple. me and you. yes or no. cake or... ahh who am i kidding, always cake.

enchantedhappy xoxo

happybirthday sarahmurphy*

it's eight twenty. lisa is sleeping in my bed. the dogs next door are barking. i'm busy stalking Lord_Voldemort7's tweets.bc theyre hilarious and brilliant. i just finished my tea. aaaand. ohmygosh its eight twenty.

Things i don't understand: What we did before we got a dishwasher. WHAT is up with Nu Metro making me BUY 3D glasses?! Could you not have told me this before I left my 8 other pairs at home. And we allll know your 'glasses aren't included in ticket price' line is a FAKESTORY. No need to lie. How sethcohen is so dang amazing. [WHY.-no. HOW you felt you had to do this at seven am, and then leave. with me feeling like this. it's just rude and you should be ashamed. i am sorry though. truly and completely. tell me how to make this right] Aaaand. I am fully going to be lame and agree with the hype: stepup3D. INSANELY COOL. Also (and more importantly) I'm in love with Moose. More than I was in the "tastes like candycanes at christmaaas" days. WAY more. So backoff. Mine. ("mine mine mine" *just for you chaitea*)

In other news of the day. Allll of you. Yes, even you. Should click on this link now. And follow my friend's blog. Bc apprently she's getting marked on the amount of followers she has. For school. Kay GO. I'm off to watch The OC, and hope Seth can make me feel better... And wonder (but not care) if the "Californiaaaa" will wake Lisa up..

enchantedhappy xoxo

claim that you missed it*

where do i begin.

regrets and recklessness. the kind i dont understand. the kind that needed to happen. the kind that made me realise your love is greater than i couldve imagined.

friendships i feel undeserving of.

friendships i finally see are over, bc that's how you need it to be. (thanks for letting me know youll always pick your girlfriend)

and delicious vanillachai, like only you can make it.

(all i want to wear this summer)

spent today: in my iheartny pjs. wondering if theyll let me go with B in december. aaand. blowing bubbles in the garden. i realised that i never watch them float away. i just like the feeling when i blow and they suddenly appear. funfact: 'on air with ryan seacrest' is the greatest radio show.

current song obsessions: teenagedream. xxxo. all i want for christmas. with me. hey man (now youre really living). rightnow im: stalking colleges. -here and there. [today's favourites: macalester and berea.] possibly freaking out over nothing. about to watch serendipity. then nottinghill for the first time. with bowls of blackcurrent jelly. and rooibos tea. lots of rooibos tea...

enchantedhappy xoxo

she thought aloud. to you*

I am not a troubled girl.
I trust.

In the one who created everything I see around me.

The sky. Autumn’s leaves. Your eyes.

In the one who knows every thought I’ve ever had.

Every dream I’ve ever wished upon a star.
Each of my hopes. And which of them will come true.


I trust.
In the beauty of our friendship.
In the person I am with you.
In your judgement.
Because you look to Him to know what’s right.
I trust in honesty.
Me to you, and your heart to mine.

I am not a troubled girl.

I love.

That she’s in my life.
That she knows me better than I know myself.
My thoughts before I think them.
What I want out of life.
Who I need in the moment.


I love.
Smiling to myself when I’m proud of you.
Dancing in the street.
To listen to his heartbeat.
He trusted me, he let me in.
But he no longer sees the man I saw him become.
He no longer sees himself through my heart.
He doubted my trust.
So he broke it.


I love never being afraid to hope.
“I love us.”
It’s not just a good movie quote.

I am not a troubled girl.

I know.
The strength it takes to recover.

What I believe in.

Who I want to be.

The light I want to shine.

The impact I will make in this world.

Who’s hearts I want my life to reflect.

I’m certain. I’ve decided.

I know.

Sometimes I don’t understand.

Sometimes it breaks my heart.

Sometimes not everything matches.

Your thoughts. My fears. Their actions.

Sometimes it hurts.

And I want to run.

But to, or from?
He’s already holding my heart.
He always holds me together.
You never have to worry.
He is my King. My rock. My only hope.
I am His precious daughter.
Nothing satisfies like His Word.
No one consoles like His Spirit.
The light He shines through my heart.

Only, sometimes. (And there shouldn’t be an only)

But sometimes. I stop and wonder.

Who will hold me when my insides shatter?

When I trust His plan,

When I know it’ll be okay.

But I can’t stop shaking.

Not knowing that.

The uncertainty in relationships.

The unpredictability my world is a testament to.

Makes me human.

Not troubled.

Not unworthy of truth; not betrayed.
(Sometimes betrayed)

But that I know betrayal for what it is, is a blessing in itself.

A blessing.

Soak it in, Andrea. You are blessed.

Your life thus far.

You always dreaming big.

The people who have shaped your life.

The way you know your heart.

The times you let them in.
This moment.
A blessing.
Breathe.

enchantedhappy xoxo

you should be so lucky*

"yes i own the hotel, and live in it. my life is very much like monopoly"

 ilovethismovie :) two favourite songs so far: big yellow taxi. and magic moments. haha and theyre testing the bed's bounciness. this is a GREAT movie* lovely lovely movie. hugh grant, you rock my world. and sandra bullock rocks yours. ah love* hmmm. shall i watch youvegotmail next? perhaps. tomorrow is simply asia day. i love the concept of i make. you wear it.  and generally im not a fan of those 'fill in your version of the survey' things. at all. but hey. why not...

flowers or shapes? flowers please. in my hair, and in vases around my house like in thegreatgatsby. but if stars count as shapes, stars always win. always.

"but if it's any consolation, i will be dead eventually."

"that's just silly. have you met everybody on the planet?"

my favourite disney villian: i dont like villians. they scare me. i generally scream at them. and the main character for trusting them. every.time.i.watch.it. do they never learn?

my favourite clothing item when i was little: um. how little? i went through so many phases. when i was like.. a baby. my strawberry dress, (HIMYM moment: "her name was strawberry!!") my mommy embroidered it. later on...3/4 pants. and platforms. haha. yes i had kicks. i lost one when we lived in the hotel in atlanta. yes lived. for long. best experience ever. the losing of the shoe ended the phase. but it was okay, bc id just had my pink fakesnakeskin pants made. OH YES I DID.

rightnow, id most like to wear: hmm. the chiffondress blair's minion wears to the snowflake ball.

the worst thing i ever did was: perhaps that time i pretended to have run away and my parents got all the neighbours involved in the search for me. only to find id been hiding in the secret compartment of my cupboard for hours? i dno, that could be it...

where is your cellphone rightnow? on the table next to me. i just got an sms from victoria. reminding me of what id said.

"okay, we obviously can't leave you alone with a stapler"

my hair: NEVER grows. whhhy does it hate me?! don't answer that. actually, maybe do.

"like a bobcat salty type pretzel.. because that's what men want."

when i grow up i want to be: mostly the girl i described yesterday. the girl who sparkles when she walks. and lives in the moment. the girl who lights up a room. who lights up his eyes. i want to always be living out my passion. i want to always be living for jesus. living with god as my centre. i want to inspire your hearts. i want to be honest and trusting. spontaneous and true. to be the most sincere, loyal friend. i want to be an encouragement. to be a source of strength. never to need to run to someone, but to always have people in my life who i can run to. i always want to believe in love, wishing on stars and the beauty of dreams. more than anything else, all ive ever wanted to be, is truly happy. truly deeply completely happy.

enchantedhappy xoxo

a million times before*

[image via herecomesthesun]

thelakehouse is on. but im trying not to pay attention, incase it breaks my heart. countdown to twoweeksnotice: thirtyseven minutes. "you weren't there. you didn't come." oh no, she sounds devastatingly calm. aaah he's asking her not to give up. whhhy is this movie on. why. (don't listen, andrea. don't listen to their heartbreak.)

(i love kittypaws. paws paws kittypaws.) stalking: forme-foryou. wonderful weekend photos. she has 'you are beautiful' engraved into her bedroom mirror. wears nailpolish in the colours i love. loves to photograph her cat. and she does 'this is what we ate' posts that actually look delicious. my calendar alarm for twoweeksnotice just went off. [view. confirm] i am taking this really seriously, haha im a strange lil girl. you know what i havent done in a while? iced cupcakes. and remember those homemade suckers? mmm summer.  

enchantedhappy xoxo

to be your anything*

[images via seemeeverywhere/artpixie]

that's how you make my heart feel. like it should twirl around and smile that smile. the smile only you can read, the smile your heart knows*

(nothing makes me smile like a new taylorswift song. and i just got a ton) rightnow im laughing at: monologue song (la la la) from when she was on snl. it's the greatest* mmm daddy's making delicous food. countdown to twoweeksnotice: three hours. countdown to thelakehouse: onehourhour. (not sure if ill be watching it though. my dad just told me it's like meetjoeblack, which broke my heart.) waitingfordinner songs: americangirl. your anything. barnyard song. lucky you. all by (you guessed it) taylorswift. apparently there are russian girls looking for me. um. no thankyou. i miss: gilmoregirls. blowpen artwork. the night we all stayed up downloading the chords to songs we loved to sing. you on guitar. and the 6am roadtrip that followed. mmmm freshcoriander. peppadew and feta. wonderful pesto. freshlybaked pitabread. exciting flavours exciting colours. I LOVE FOOD*

enchantedhappy xoxo

alfonzo isn't classy*

soundtrack to the weekend: B's amazing cd. the script. michael buble. erin mccarley.

currently obsessing over all things piano*

my daddy has bronchitis. and he breathes near me. *eugh* im getting really sick.

so to cheer me up, danna gave me a yummy stroopwafel. and an invite to a fashionshow at the capegrace hotel*

the kommetjie roadtrip was wonderful. everything was so beautiful. wow. awestruck by creation. romantic walk on the beach. built a house with luke. freshly baked scones. supporting andy schleck. B and i found our house. number 64 :) it's perfect*

we watched lawabidingcitizen again. snoekie made delicious brownies. and i wore my sethcohen chrismukkah jersey. everything feels right* perfect timing. perfectly situated. perfect love.

fact of the day: thefuelteam sucks at prank calling. shame.

enchantedhappy xoxo

caught between the already and the not yet*

it seems like everyone went to stellies lastnight. except the cgc crew. and we had a legit time in rondebosch. and you got me to sleep, thank you :) after lastnight, i feel completely sure of who i need to be. -im so excited for august* 

(i miss gossipgirl) seriously stalking online sales with danna. during office hours. bc that's how we roll. lol.

"Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't."

 -elle woods. you are my hero.

enchantedhappy xoxo