i want to be, not here. i want to be there, with him because he makes me feel like reality can be dream-like. but then i don't, then i want to just be alone spinning and spinning for hours. maybe i want to run next to a lake for hours and days and who am i kidding, i wont be allowed to run for months and months atleast. but i wish you werent doing this to me, and i wish he wasnt exactly like you, and i wish his likeness to you wasnt the thing pushing me away from the first person to understand me before i ever said words, the first person to see the truth in my heart purely because of what he saw in my eyes. and i wish you would let me just not care about all of this. and then i remember that i really dont care, and that's the issue in the first place.
but then i wish someone would get me these pink velvet ribbon shoes and bring me a pumpkin spice latte and just get me. please let me fall asleep for millions of hours, with dresses made of glitter and love all around me.
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