Wednesday, January 20, 2010

to find home*

"i'm, a satellite heart
lost in the dark.
im, spun out so far.
you stop
i start
but i'll be true to you"



i have been reading. not as much as i planned. and not the writing i intended. but it's been been interesting. i like the way they're written. as if the author just wrote it all down as it came, scattered, without thinking. and did not look back to edit it. and although i'm sure they did, i like it. i find the characters most intruiging.

"tonight, i am not okay. i am in one of those moods where i don't want to talk about it. but i don't want to be reckless either. just sitting in a quiet room would be perfect. and... i want to wear brogues. with indigo tights. dye my hair three shades darker. paint my nails silver so my fingertips glisten in the light, like a disco ball. i want to dance around like i'm having the time of my life. and then burst into tears. just for a moment. because here, with them, i feel like i'm in a bubble. reality without mine. i try to shut it out, breathe deeply, but it seems to bury deeper; inhaled with the air. and for a moment i am lost. disorientation grips me. but it dissolves almost instantly. and nobody knows of the moment before. and that's the way i want it" i like her best.


may your evening be filled with hope and magic.

enchantedhappy xoxo

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