until you smile*

{waiting for my electricblanket to warm up, stalking my new favourite photostream. as i have been all afternoon, succesfully procrastinating. i may never wash my hair.}

today i realised how quickly i get lonely, and how much sadder i am when im alone. i dont think ive always been like this, but this is who i am now. so much of who i am now will take some getting used to. so much of who i am now is a consequence of fear. the person i used to be would be so disappointed in me, bc she'd never be able to relate. but that's life.

and tonight, at 1:11, i wish for that house. and raspberry bushes. for my bedroom to smell this perfect forever. and for a kitten to love. xoxo